Humour Me...

I thought it high time to resume this blog again, the pressure of thoughts in my brain was becoming too much to bear. Two issues peaked my interest recently-

1) The sighting of an advert for a show called 'Take Me Out' by my friends Racky and Tommy, who duly informed me of a British version of the Channel Cuatro dating show (see earlier blog posts). No longer receiving Terrestrial TV signal in my house, I was, to say the least, a little skeptical when I received a text from Tommy claiming 'Oh my fucking God. The Herpes Show is going to be done in England', however a brief check with those that have the benefit of working television quickly assured me that this was indeed the case.

It will almost certainly be utter bollocks. Much of the charm of the Spanish version stemmed from the fact that we didn't have a clue what anyone was saying and could dub our own soundtrack over the top (mostly about Herpes, hence the cult title of the show among our friendship circle), an English version will almost certainly be car-crash TV, but it was only a matter of time.

More updates, as I discover them, but if Madeley isn't involved somehow, there'll be Hell to pay.

2) The item on the news about the helicopters for the forces. Naturally this is a delicate subject that could probably do without me weighing in like some manner of massive satirical elephant, thrashing around and tusking some poor native sod through the torso, however I'm going to anyway.

So, we need more helicopters in Afghanistan, that much is self-evident- people have been going on and on about the need for them for months. Fine. The PM attempts to provide more helicopters using the limited defense budget (raising questions over the spending habits of the MOD) and promptly gets shat on by the Tories for the suggestion that an RAF base will be forced to close and several MOD workers will lose their jobs. Ok, it's an election year, that's fine, this kind of stuff happens, but the Shadow Defence Minister acts as though there was another way of financing it.

In political matters such as this, it is invariably a case of robbing Peter to pay Paul, but it's a real kick in the teeth when Paul turns round and says "Hang on, you've robbed Peter, you bastard", prompting you to say "Look Paul, you ungrateful shit, at least I'm trying. If I robbed Peter to pay Luke, you'd still be right on my case and you'd have no fucking helicopters anyway." (This is all from the Marin Scorsese version of The Bible)

Anyway, that's another two issues solved (or possibly exacerbated. One of the two) so my work is done for today.