Friday Pictorial the Twenty Seventh: Sugar...

This one needs very little introduction. 99.9% of you understand where this is going...

Friday Pictorial the Twenty Sixth: Sustenance

Another poem. Because some of your are that way inclined. Inclined to a bit of the old poetry, I mean.

Friday Pictorial the Twenty Fifth: Songwriting

I'll apologise for this. It's 18 minutes long and doesn't even get to the original point I was trying to make. Too long, some would say (bastards, goldfish etc.) and it can't all be funny, can it? Also catch this one before the inevitable court case arises. You can say 'I saw that before he was bludgeoned to death by Hollywood lawyers'...




And yes, I do know it's 'Allied Carpets', thank you.

Friday Pictorial the Twenty Fourth: Memoirs

Let's face it, none of you have actually read the Blair memoirs, right? Yeah, but have you actually read them? Hmm? Didn't think so. Don't worry though. I've bitten the bullet and digested the text for you in this handy video.




Ooh Yeah! Satire! *fist pump*

Friday Pictorial the Twenty Third: Birds

People with iPhones (unlike me) will get this... as will, I hope, people without them (like me), but if you like apps and all that malarkey then this will be right up your street...

Friday Pictorial the Twenty Second: Advertising

So, what can you expect from FriPic XXII? Well, the usual really: comedy accents, satire and a wee bit of Curb Your Enthusiasm thrown in for good measure.

When Kraft took over Cadbury it was seen as a bitter blow struck by American big business. But we hadn't seen the half of it...

Friday Pictorial the Twenty First: Fox

Here we are, Twenty First Pictorial Fox, you could say (if you wanted, your choice really). Here's a no doubt sensitive and insightful channel Five documentary to look out for.



Fun Fact: Stripes is only the second ever guest star in a Friday Pictorial. (Alright, so 'fun' might have been a strong word...)

Ooh, before I forget, this is a prologue to a longer sketch by me and Tommy Isaac, so hopefully you'll get to see the full feature sometime in the future.

Friday Pictorial the Twentieth: International Men of Mystery...

Well, we've already discussed my favourite story of the week and here's a FriPic dedicated to that. Join outspoken political commentator Benn Gleck for his take on the scandal.

Friday Pictorial the Nineteenth: Tennis

Well, well, it's been all go down at the All England Club and the Friday Pictorial simply couldn't resist joining in the action. So join pundit and ex-pro Jim Backenroe for his take on the longest match in tennis history.

Friday Pictorial the Eighteenth: Reality

Right, the Friday Pictorial returns, although today's is perhaps more of a Friday Audio...torial, Auditorial? I don't know, it's basically more sound than pictures anyway.

In exciting news we have a brand new contributor for this one. None other than the legendary singer/songwriter Mr. Tom Waits! Who I commissioned to write a song about reality TV. This is what happened...

Friday Pictorial the Seventeenth: Football

Well, World Cup fever is taking hold and everyone's been putting out their songs to spur on England. I can't help but feel, however, that many of them aren't looking at it in the right way.
To that end here is the Friday Pictorial unofficial World Cup song...

Friday Pictorial the Sixteenth: Music

It's fair to say that I don't often receive requests for the Friday Pictorial, but in this case I did. In a past life I used to create little musical comedy numbers and it just so happens that one of you lovely followers asked for a Pictorial based around one of those. As ever, I aim to please, so here you are.



Just to clarify again. The statements in the video are just for comedic purposes and in no way should anyone alert lawyers/release hounds etc.

Friday Pictorial the Fifteenth: Election

Well, as few of you will have failed to notice, we've had a change of government, which has been less than popular in its formation on this site.

A little known fact is that in my constituency, following the success of the televised leaders debates, the Electoral Commission trialled a new voting system involving touch screen and voice recognition technology. Here are the results.




Booya! Satire *fist pump*!

Friday Pictorial the Fourteenth: Art

Right, here's the FriPic. Are we all in need of cheering up? I thought so. Fortunately this isn't about the election and happily there wasn't a result so it doesn't matter that this particular piece of satire is aimed at the art world and not the political world. Yes, the shortlist for this year's Turner Prize was unveiled last week and here I lampoon modern art.



Yeah, modern artists are going to have to take a long, hard look at themselves after this.

Friday Pictorial the Thirteenth: The Hundredth Post!

Well, we made it! 100 posts.

Here's a video to celebrate. It's been a long, long week and I apologise that in this video I do an even poorer job of hiding the fact that I made it all up on the spot than usual. Hope you forgive me this time. Improv is never quite as easy as you hope.

Friday Pictorial the Twelfth: Rejection...

Right, another Friday, another Pictorial for your delectation. A proper video again this time, not being mostly lazy like last week. This one deals with the heartbreaking topic of rejection. While I hope that this is actually amusing for other people and not just unashamed catharsis for me.

If anyone reading this has rejected me at some point (and let's face it, you probably have) I must point out that any resemblance to to you/your company/director/producer is mostly coincidental.

This one contains a whiff of strong language, but you knew that already, right? Also contains beer.




Keen-eyed viewers among you may spot a hint of 'Bernard's Letter'.

Friday Pictorial the Eleventh: Politics

Here's my cartoon vision of a dystopian future, in honour of last night's election debate.

Apologies for my meagre drawing/inking skills.

Friday Pictorial the Tenth: Relationships

Here we are, a decade of Friday Pictorials (well ten). This one is the first to feature a guest writer (so you can direct all your complaints about misogyny to her) who handily supplied a script which I went on to forget during filming, so I guess it was a collaborative effort. So, what can you expect from FriPic X? Well, relationship expert Dana Liebowitz will help you find love (if you're a man). No other male understands the female psyche in quite the way that Liebowitz does and after two bestselling (in their category) manuals and a whole host of lawsuits, the brash American is dispensing advice for free over the interweb.



The lovely lady who wrote the 10 steps for this pictorial also has a blog which you should all read and today features a sister post to this one, with her very own 10 steps to dating success for women.

Yes, I'm aware that I have large hands... possibly Kermode large.

Friday Pictorial the Ninth: Jazz Poetry

Right, it's bank holiday weekend time! And I'm off for Easter, so this is being posted now. As always, tell your friends.




Enjoy a blend of Tom Waits and Tim Key and have an excellent Easter, folks (notice how I resisted the urge to make a pun there...).

Friday Pictorial the Eighth - Arts & Crafts

After all that build up yesterday, here is the finished product. It's low budget kids arts and crafts, Joe, but not as we know it. What do you mean you aren't Joe?! Oh for fu... where's Joe?!

It's lampooning two very different styles of people. One is children's TV presenters and the other... well, you'll have to watch to find out. Stay tuned, kids, 'cause you just might learn something...



There's a bonus for fans of a now defunct radio item too...