Endorsements

"It was the most offended I've ever been by a Killer Whale story." Mrs. Trellis of North Wales

"I liked the video bit, that was quite good." J. Stephenson of Tucson, Arizona.

"Nope, never heard of it." Business Secretary, Vince Cable MP


Friday 21 January 2011

Political Turmoil...

It's fair to say I've learnt a few things this week. Not only did I learn what vajazzling was, but I (as did we all) discovered a few home truths about politics. Firstly, I learnt that (and frankly we should all have taken note from Costner) it is never advisable to trust your bodyguard with a woman. Yes, poor old Alan Johnson, struggling to get to grips with his new role as Shadow Chancellor had to put up with the alleged hanky panky between his wife and his personally assigned security official. So, it was Johnson out/Balls in (and believe me, I'm on Twitter, I've heard every joke going about this, so you can all just imagine your favourite one here). And from one heavy-handed reference to a cock to another - Andy Coulson resigned as Communications Chief in the Coalition Government earlier today. Perhaps, nugget of advice number 2 is it is never advisable to award a man allegedly repsonsible for the illegal tapping of the phones of pop culture luminaries such as Sienna Miller and Andy Gray a key position in government.

So, Coulson who resigned his leadership of the News of the World amid allegations of overseeing a culture of phone-hacking and was inexplicably rewarded for this by being allowed into Cameron's inner sanctum (I've created a notion that disgusts even myself there) and today he's resigned his position with the statement that he could 'no longer give 110%'. I'm fairly certain he couldn't give that in the first place as it is A MATHEMATICAL IMPOSSIBILITY. Classic hack soundbite, mind - you're resigning from the government, you're not on the fucking Apprentice. Reports of him defending his position with the claim that he has 'a field of ponies' remain unsubstantiated.

It's one of those periods of 24 hours where all news happens at once and it becomes impossible to work out who's trying to bury their news underneath all the others. Nevertheless, short of Blair yelling 'Alright, I knew this would happen. It all went wrong. Everything was wrong!' at the Chilcot Inquiry, Coulson is rightly the lead news story. Who will Dave replace him with? Rupert Murdoch? Robert Maxwell? Or perhaps just Joseph Goebbels...

That's it for this week, I'm afraid.

Soupy twist.

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